The Kilchoman 2008 Vintage 92 Proof

30 ml cigarette pouch mini

Kilchoman-2008-VintageTasting notes:
On the nose it’s fresh aquarium charcoal spread across the floor after I tripped and fell.  I dust myself off and breathe in super grainy, super refined, super classy notes.  This is no ordinary cigar bar, I mutter to myself as I look around.  I see in the mirrored pillars that I’m wearing cartoonishly-offensive sultan clothing, a turban festooned with faux jewels, and ridiculous gold shoes with elvish, curled-up toes.  I reach for my harissa-flavored tobacco argeelah and draw in deeply.

The mouth bites with the fervency of a leach.  This is the moment, I think to myself, that I’ll later remember as a lesson.  I’m Elmer Gantry beseeching the potholes to heal themselves—and hastily, on account of the oncoming winter.  Steaming tar fills the hole and closes this scene in a sensory fog.

The finish is a mermaid surfacing out of quicksand to steal a sandwich from unsuspecting picnickers.  (They suspected neither the theft nor its half-fish, half-woman mastermind.)  She was smoking a long, hand-rolled cigarette.  The smell hung in the air long after the brightness of the shock settled into dim dismay.



On the scale of cartoon characters who smell like cigarette smoke–
The Kilchoman 2008 Vintage is Selma Bouvier–This chain-smoking sister of Marge Simpson might be confused with her twin, Patty.  But Selma is the one who likes Police Academy movies and Hummel figurines, and walking through the park on clear autumn days.  I can’t think of a better accompaniment than a bracing dram from Islay’s youngest distillery.



–Our thanks to ImpEx for the sample!

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