The Balmenach 8 Year 2007 from The Exclusive Malts

60 ml Jeopardy Champion mini

Balmenach-8-Year-2007-from-The-Exclusive-MaltsTasting notes
Who’s cooking emu burgers? And is that a brioche moonlighting as a bun? I personally wouldn’t have thought to add cherry compote, sour cheese, and marigolds…but then again, I’m only a 1-star Michelin chef, you know? Why has the Department of Labor engaged in protracted negotiations and contract reviews with my sous chef? And who put Raspberry Snapple into my glass? (Can this review consist only of interrogatives? Why or why not?)

Who manufactures chrysanthemum-flavored oral anesthetics? How did my tongue get the autonomy to take the Big Round “Oh, Yeah!” Kool Aid Guy hostage, and why is it demanding a ransom of beryllium ingots and yellow cake batter?

Does candied gun powder work only in cap guns? Can rhino-injected apples be converted naturally and organically into rhino-poetry? Where do this vague sense of regret come from? Should I never have gone to the Culinary Institute of America, but rather gotten that MD or become a CPA?


Would the best scale for rating the Balmenach 8 Year 2007 from The Exclusive Malts be Pete Wells’ New York Times restaurant review of Guy Fieri’s “Guy’s American Kitchen & Bar in Times Square”? If that review is a masterpiece while the subject is not, why is it that this review is not a masterpiece while the subject is?




–Our thanks to ImpEx for the sample!

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