Before I open this, we’ve got to talk about the name. I mean, this is a real hardo move to just go ahead and give yourself name like this. It’s kind of like the Subaru Impreza except without the subliminal communication. They just own it. Love this move, Glenfiddich.
On the nose, it’s French linen tea towels mopping up orange juice from a marble tiled countertop. Then more citrus. Sliced lemons pulled off of the flank of a poached salmon and dropped into glasses of iced tea when the kitchen prep workers were too busy to cut fresh ones. It really clouded up the iced tea but none of the customers minded. Biscuit-sized rounds cut from slippery elm branches. Then they are sanded into hockey pucks by urchins, offers Bill. The sea creatures? I wonder. No, street kids, was his tart reply.
I see. But that would be incredibly artisanal to have the hockey pucks made by echinoderms. I can just see the product description touting the “pedicillaria-made sustainable hockey pucks.” I know the latest rage is aquaponics. But why not put the humble sea urchin to work in a craft? Give a sea urchin a puck, he plays hockey for a day. But teaching him to make a puck…
What’s that, Bill? You want me to talk about the mouth? Okay. Lovely mouth. Spicy, sweet, savory. A taste delight. Beautiful mouthfeel. The Aristotelian mean has been hit with a bowman’s precision. I now think they missed the opportunity when they named it with an English word. Why not get your Greek on and call it “The Arête”?
The finish is really wonderful. Think of a Louisiana bayou-themed water park with a “lazy river” style inner tube ride. Lush vegetation crowds in at all sides, the water is warm except in those spots where the shade cools it, and you can stick your hand down into simulated cypress tree root balls to noodle frosty beers. After you’re refreshed you can throw the empties at the heads of your friends. If that sounds like a good way to spend a Sunday afternoon, then I think the Glenfiddich “Excellence” is going to be your go-to whisky.
The Glenfiddich Excellence 26 Year Old is megalopsychia–No, this is not one of Godzilla’s rivals, it’s the virtue having to do with honor on a large scale. The great-souled man thinks himself worthy of great honors, and is. ‘Nuff said.
–Our thanks to Wm. Grant & Sons for the sample!