The Glenrothes 1998-2013 opens on the set of Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs with a parasailer being towed by a windsurfer on a lake of simmering beef stew liberally salted with paprika, awash with onions, carrots, and red potatoes. The updraft is intoxicating, wafting up Manchego rinds, for umami, and Pharoah Sanders practicing saxophone, for moody atmosphere. As it opens, we find ourselves in a walnut shed with recently-oiled well-used tools. (Odd how that description applies to John and Stephen, isn’t it?) Calimyrna figs, bought in Smyrna, macerated in a mixture of linseed and sesame oil.
On the mouth, it’s more beef boullion: Pinenuts and a sage-thyme crust on a beefarita—or was it a beeftini? It moves from a low register to a high note, like a baritone aspiring to be a countertenor, wondering whatever happened to professional Castrati. A distinctive wild boar protein shake served at a Gold’s Gym™ Health Bar (bell). This chased by (change of scene!) a high-end lemonade toddy at a tailgating party at a Baylor-Texas Christian University football game, attended by Tanya “Tangy” Burns, sister of Montgomery and Tuscaloosa.
The finish is taking a long hike in Yellowstone National Park: a waft of fresh smoke and a lot of lodgepole pine trees, buffalo, and big skies. There are elk chased with indeterminate intent, the sweat of their fear and excitement palpably trailing behind them (is there a word for that?), scenting the air, coating my throat: a long slow climax before the kill. Elkburgers!
The Glenrothes 1998-2013 is Bryce Canyon–It’s rusty, rugged, dusty, jagged, striking, fantastical—and if I may quote from the shockingly poetic government website, “There’s no place quite like Bryce Canyon. Hoodoos (odd-shaped pillars of rock left standing from the forces of erosion) can be found on every continent, but here is the archetypal “hoodoo-iferous” terrain. Descriptions fail.” Really, what more can be said?
–Our thanks to Georgie Greene and Anchor Distilling Company for the sample!