The Karuizawa 1964 48 year-old Whisky

 
 [This amazingly luxe whisky came to us from an outfit called Wealth Solutions out of Poland (via Master of Malt), and it came in a presentation box made of petrified Polish oak.]

[Oh, and this review is what happens when we promise Bill that he can post a review without us editing it.] 

Tasting notes: 

The Karuizawa,
Distilled 1964.
Black oak, fossilized.

Matsuo Bashō:
Known for exquisite haiku,
Not whisky blogging.
  
Our guest reviewer?
You are inebriated;
We are Impostors.  

 
Hot stewed apricots
Lovingly held by Jesus.
Bill, a Jew, converts! 
 
Like no aroma
Rising from glass or cask in
Human history.

Urushi lacquer,
Lost Ark of the Covenant,
Samurai armor.

Even without HAL
9000, spaceships shut down
in its atmosphere:

Granite trachea.
An odbyt z betonu:
Masterful driving! 
 
Shinto “angel share”
To Ama-no-Uzume,
Goddess of revels. 
 
Dangling upside-down,
Helicopter bungee cord,
Over climax woods.  
 
In old-growth forest,
Miyazaki’s Totoro
Enamors young girl.

Neuronal dendrites:
Jack’s beanstalk climbs through sinus
Into gray matter.

Rubbing rice paper,
Coconut meat eraser,
Lost gnostic gospels. 
  
Crystal spring water,
Sprinkling of shogun ashes,
Bitter root: mandrake. 
 
Yang of love-making
With soon-to-be ex-girlfriend,
Yin of surrender.

Artisinal grind,
Paris Hilton Dremel tool,
It bling-blings for thee. 
 
Undiagnosed
Diseases instantly cured:
The Karuizawa!   
 
Mortal enemy
Committing hari-kari
With Uni sushi.

Magical barrel
Holds albino akita
For forty-eight years. 
 
National Living
Treasure Cooper loses mind,
Makes bonsai-tree tun. 
 
Hibachi-grilled
Kumquats, odd pairing: Cheddar
Bratwursts and green tea.

Layering flower
Petals with beams of sunshine:
Mokume-gane.

Midwestern exec,
Small business, woven from
Butterfly lashes.  
 
Possible to rate?
Only on scale of no scales:
The Karuizawa.
 

  

  

–Our thanks to Master of Malt and Wealth Solutions for the sample!